Myspacing, Instant-messaging, skyping, facebooking, e-mailing, texting, twittering relationships. Yeah…I know. That’s pretty complicated, but so is the virtual realm of dating. I think some people call it pseudo-dating. But, whatever you want to name it, it sucks. It doesn’t work.
Take it from a girl who knows. Shamedly, I have been in MISFETT relationships where men send me virtual roses through facebook rather than walk up to the flower shop, buy them with hard-earned cash and deliver them to my door. Instead I get….a new profile picture??
All of a sudden when I meet guys, instead of asking for my phone number they ask if we can be friends on facebook. So instead of a phone call I should expect a wall post or a facebook message? This is new.
MISFETT relationships don’t work because they are based on everything except reality. Why is it easier to tell someone you love them over skype rather than in person? Because doing it in the digital world makes it seem like it is more fantastical than actual.
Is this really happening?
If the person is directly in front of you, or you hear a voice over the phone, communication becomes much more 3D—the way it should be. If you get caught up in a MISFETT relationship the romance can become quite cartoonish, almost childish. You end up saying and doing things you would never do in 3D.
Secretly, I think that many women (and maybe some men too) want a You’ve Got Mail romance. A man (or woman) falls in love with you before he/she even sees your face. You’d think that a relationship based on text would have more substance. Lovers wrote letters to each other in the dark ages and they seemed to make it. Why are texts, e-mails, or facebook messages any different? Perhaps our language and methods have become so base that they don’t merit enough true meaning.
Maybe the real concern we should have is when we choose MISFETT relationships over ones that actually involve spending time together. We’d rather chat over the internet than call or go get a cup of coffee together.
Even when there is no other way to communicate, because of long-distance, MISFETT relationships still don’t work. At some point the communication must become 3D. At some point you must be willing to say what you mean and mean what you say to the other person’s face.
So friends…and especially girls…please say no to MISFETT relationships. No one wants e-flowers.
